30 something guys and the yap

there is a breed of man out there that i always heard about... the late 20's, early 30's guy, who may or may not have a degree and whose only goal in life is to drink, hang out, get high and hook up. somehow i've always managed to avoid this breed - as kinda like a schitzu or a miniature schnauzer, the incessant yapping (about drinking and smoking) is kinda like fingernails screeching down a chalkboard.

however, as a single female, i've been, up until this point, inclined to give a guy a chance thinking... it's just a front. there's something deeper to him. really there is.

however like the miniature schnauzer, i've come to realize that they just can't help but yap. sad but true.

case in point... i met a guy - about my age - on myspace during the past semester. he seemed nice enough, although his myspace page talked a lot about drinking - he also mentioned reading, philosophy, he had a degree and a professional job. when the semester ended we went out once downtown and had a fun time bar hopping and dancing. naturally, no serious conversation involved.

a few weeks later we decided to hang out again. it was up to him to come up with the plan. the creative night out involved dinner, a movie at home and a bowl (and we're not talking ice cream people). no more than 10 minutes into the afternoon, drinking and partying and his friends who have gotten locked up / arrested for various idiotic offenses had come up - multiple times. he was trying to impress afterall. i tried my best to divert the conversation in another direction. afterall, i've had lots of experience with dog training and have learned many attention diverting tactics that will prevent / deter incessant yapping.

for instance, when talking about healthy food, i learned that banana peels can processed and smoked for that "natural fruity goodness high". i discovered that he could blow smoke rings and that i should be impressed by this talent. on the way up to dinner at the sushi restaurant, it was unveiled that eating enough wasabi could also have a mind altering effect. there was no topic that could be discussed that did not, in some way, create a convoluted reference back to some sort of mind altering substance.

i tried to divert - really i did.

i guess he'd be easy to shop for. if ya like wasabi, try this value-sized jar of horseradish on for size.

to make matters worse, said boy was a terrible kisser, and towards the end of the evening, had this irritable habit of poking me when i started to get too comfortable. and this, my friends, is just a brief synopsis.

in the end, all i wanted to do was get the heck outta dodge - without hurting any feelings. and when the movie ended, that i did.

it's not that i don't enjoy / understand partying, going out and having fun. i've certainly had my share of wildly insane times. but that share has decreased over time, and i can only truly enjoy going out, if my life is fulfilling in many other ways. and i certainly don't need to talk about it 24-7. it's incredible to think that someone my age is completely focused in a totally different direction. and, oh yea, i'm destined to live alone with 4 dogs or MOVE if this is any representation of the single boy gene pool in this area.

i've always tried to not judge a book by its cover, even though i'm a graphically inspired individual with great respect for creativity and presence. but unfortunately a cover can be quite telling and sometimes, not judging leads to painfully long evenings with random people who are stuck in a teenage / early twenty something party time warp. sorry folks but i might have to revert to judging as i simply can not stand yappers. i guess i'm just a big dog type of girl.