mars & venus

if u haven't ever read the book men are from mars... women are from venus... then you should and if you have read the book... then you'll be with me in this post ...

there is a chapter in the book that articulates the inherent conflict resulting from the differences in how men and women deal with issues... not just relationship issues... but yeah...mostly relationship issues.

the immediate, instinctual and perhaps primal response to a difficult situation with a significant other for the man is the allegorical cave. he holes up, walks away, closes up and needs "space". not forever type of space (well not normally).. just some quiet down time of some particular, undetermined length to sort out his thoughts. regardless of the outcome he needs to think.

then comes the women... her instinctual response is to "talk things out". she needs to know - right then and there as she's emotional, upset and she looks to him for solace. this in turns pushes said man further into his cave (i suspect he has a headlamp as how can one see down there?).

while i'm not one to stereotype i think that there is some truth to this particular chapter.

the woman wants to mediate, repair, sooth, taaalllkkk and the man needs to step away and contemplate. we're not sure what exactly he's contemplating during this time... his golf game, who won stage ...of the giro, etc. but we do know he needs the time to step back, cool down and regroup.

if we - the female species - know this, then why is it so difficult to let the man go do his thing in peace?? after all, some space can be ok and sometimes communication via level headed thoughts is better than a long, drawn out emotional conversation where tensions run high and deep.

then again, perhaps the woman is afraid the man will hole up and never see the light of day again.

so the moral of this story is as follows.
ladies: if the man says he needs space - let him go and hope he comes back in one piece. buggin the hell out of him - no matter how good your intentions are - typically makes things worse. yes it's hard... but we've gotta do it for the sake of man kind if we are ever to live harmoniously as a unit.

men: reassure your lady and let her know that you'll be back so she doesn't worry to much... and then look for the light - try for the sake of womankind. the sooner the better, let her know what's up... we promise you won't get burned - atleast not too bad where it won't just peel off a bit revealing newer, fresher skin.

the end.

one

so deep - believed he was the one.
was i so wrong?
how could i be so wrong?
if i was, why does it hurt so much?
why do i miss him so much after mere hours apart?

how can nothing - cause everything to crumble into thin air?

life's transparency makes it hard to hold on at times.

release

there is no better way to release built up tension and frustration than with a super fun solo ride.
I like to call this one the ROADIE TOUR OF mild DIRT AND GRAVEL climbs. (case sensitive). It's short, sweet and shaded which makes it an excellent - mid/end summer choice. too bad it was friggin cold out. a mere 50 degrees when i left this am - isn't it supposed to be summer or something?

regardless, there's no better way to start a day...

just another...

some nights - so hollow you might bend over and break in two.
some nights - look back on the past and wonder how you could have been so stupid and naive for so long.
some nights you wonder who you are, and where you belong... unsure of where you're supposed to be and upon what path is best to travel.
some nights - all you do is question your ability, poise, figure, shape and form
some nights - all you need is a warm non-judgmental voice to reassure - selfless arms to embrace and foster security.

the sun will rise soon and rested eyes will open to a new day...

salamander arms?

This is cool but also somewhat disturbing. i wonder what type of limb he'll grow???
hmmmmm...

21/30 - garden update

Well - for those of you who have been following the multi-month saga - the vote on my gardens is in. I needed 21/30 units to vote in my favor to keep my plots in tact... and i got

21/30.

in the words of ry - HOLY DANG!!! i just BARELY convinced a majority to vote on my behalf...

so - in short - i get to plant my tomatoes and string beans, keep my butterfly bush and tulips, and thus i don't have to move... to enjoy fresh veges.... for the time being atleast.

woo hoo!!! thank you to MISHA who convinced me to fight the fight!!! yay - wouldn't have tried without you girl!

century!

in honor of mothers day... cecilia got a "get out of jail free card"... in the world of a cyclist who's current first job is being "mom", one must make special accommodations to fit in riding time. On this particular day - she it all - a sitter, a supportive husband... understanding kids.. and an IF that was ready to roll...

and off we went. the plan was this ride - with the last 15 or so needed to make it a cool 100 TBD depending on how we felt at mile 80. .. i started a bit worn from a 50 miler the day before in the cold rain... but i was excited to be out.

we departed around 830... temp in the low 50's, overcast... with some gnarly gusting winds... the ride was probably the windiest i had ever done... especially considering we both pulled our own weight the entire way - riding side by side. while 192 became monotonous as going fast was not an option in 20+ MPH headwinds, the livonia stretch with 2 perfect climbs and a beautiful stretch of road, quickly made up for it. although we were forced to pedal down the descents to combat the wind...

After a full day of light light rain, wind, fatigue, hunger... funny stories, deep discussions about life and people... we hit the 100 mile marker.

this was the first century of the season... with many more to come.