What's missing from the above picture?
Hint: it's creamy, baked and a gourmet item normally only served around the holidays or for gatherings deserving of such a treat.
Answer: a full 10 oz serving of baked brie cooked in a light pastry dough.
Where did it go you may wonder?
Hint: see below.
Answer: right into my labrador's belly. note the clean plate. dove in when all were in the kitchen. sneaky little bastard!
This blog is dedicated to the sweeter side of life and to the dog who does
her best to steal said sweets. It's been a long semester and I have found myself, largely and sadly, uninspired to bake. I don't mean to toot my own horn, but seriously folks, home girl can bake.
Lately i've found myself perpetually hungry and completely exhausted. Baking has always been a relaxing venture for me so in response I decided to start again with the following goals in mind:
Yesterday was a day of cookies. many, many cookies. It started with a dog walk... We took chaya and aidia out to explore the race loop in big hollow (which i'm now convinced i can ride)... then we baked cookies.
the dogs begged as only dogs can. however my dog set a new and unprecedented record for longest strand of contiguous drool...
it happened in the dining room. we were sitting and filling cookies with chocolate...
chaya was standing in between us staring - and drooling.
it started as a small strand but slowly elongated... to the point that it was 6" plus long - maybe longer. it was clear and free of bubbles... drool perfection.
if only i had a camera to document the event. it was priceless.
Last, but not least... bark in the park. the game -- rained out. but dog people are a determined pack. we hung out in the stadium for close to 3 hours. Look at this pretty girl ...
Tecalli attacking Randall. Note the energy level in this pict - and the fact that 3/4 of us MATCH our furry companions. chaya and I are discussing worldly issues of great significance. Yes, us dog people have issues. we are ok with that. 
Nicole hung out with us although she was dog-less. eric was the only one who didn't match his dog! he also was the only photographer present yet he was sans-camera. 
As the night wore on, the monsters became progressively more mellow. Pepper is always my buddy. Chaya is curled up on my other side napping.
Yawn. can we go home now? come on humans -- we need our beauty sleep.
someone was over tired after a long day of working with mom. she decided she was a lap dog but didn't quite fit into mom's lap. ridiculous but i love her just that way!
luna and i by the stadium. we both match our dogs. ruk took this with her digital rebel. i'm jealous. good people.
e, nicole and i topped the night off at champs where we collected glasses of water, soda and tonic that the forgetful waitress kept bringing. nice.
phew. hope you enjoyed the show. now i'm tired - goodnight.
maybe i should change my topic.
HELLO PEOPLE. my dog eats glass. and let me assure you that it's not cause she's lacking in the fiber(glass) department. dogs eat what tastes GOOD at the time. she also picks string beans in the garden and sniffs other dogs butts.
Sign this if you have a few minutes. I guess the more public support there is, the more difficult life becomes for Vick. And we all know that politicians don't like dirty laundry laying around in the public's eye.
oh my -- how can someone, so anonymous, be so confused!!! for the public record - i don't beat, kick, or feed my dog chocolate, grapes, bread, sugar, raisins, poison apples or sumac, dish washing fluid, or any other toxic substance... not usually anyway :) i mean perhaps, once in a while, on her birthday, summer solstice and other special occasions... but a good beating always comes from the heart. it is unfortunate that this happy, healthy, and ever so lovingly trained Labrador lashes out in the form of counter surfing when i'm gone during the day. she can't help it, she's a dog. dogs like to eat. people forget. but alas... just to spur your memories... here is the original post:
read original post and comments
and here, my friends, is the response, crafted with tender - loving - care:
a lot of us don't know this until it is too late. chocolate can be fatal to a dog or a cat. even in small amounts. it's really too bad how you talk about you little blessing. when a dog misbehaves, in this case you could educate yourself on what is poisonous to a dog, it is usually the owner who has not lovingly trained him or her not to act out. a good trainer could be quite helpful. also a puppy's brain doesn't even fully develop until they are 6 months old. i'm sure you love her very much, but i've never heard anyone except those arrested for animal cruelty talk this way....about kicking them around and such.
On average,
Milk chocolate contains 44 mg of theobromine per oz.
Semisweet chocolate contains 150mg/oz.
Baker's chocolate 390mg/oz.
Using a dose of 100 mg/kg as the toxic dose it comes out roughly as:
1 ounce per 1 pound of body weight for Milk chocolate
1 ounce per 3 pounds of body weight for Semisweet chocolate
1 ounce per 9 pounds of body weight for Baker's chocolate.
So, for example, 2 oz. of Baker's chocolate can cause great risk to an 15 lb. dog. Yet, 2 oz. of Milk chocolate usually will only cause digestive problems.
if you're trying to off your pooch - use Baker's chocolate - in large quantities. and for heaven's sake people, don't use brownies - especially cheesecake ones. save yourself the baking time as you can feed 'em purina, kibbles and bits or even better yet, Old Roy and get similar results. 
well, ladies and gentleman... it turns out that in the process of eating an entire pan of brownies, my furry girl also managed to consume a good portion of the glass pan itself. this was confirmed by large pile of fragments sitting on the floor upstairs in the spare room.
great - another mess to clean up. this mess was a good 2 handfuls deep in GLASS. how the heck did she:
a. swallow it
b. hack it up without cutting the heck outta her insides?
this will remain a mystery.
i'm on mess #3 but i think i see the light. i mean, how much more can possibly come out of that tiny little belly?
i decided to bring chaya into the lab so i could keep an eye on her. the vet told me to keep feeding her heavy foods to assist with the whole "glass passing". items recommended included entire loaves of bread, and cotton balls doused in heavy cream.
mmmm - nothing like a few good cotton balls to wash down - i mean wash out some tasty blue glass.
So, i spent the first hour + of my day today cursing Jess at the gym. she gave me a new workout that is totally kicking my weakling ass. damn! my hands and forearms are completely spent - but i guess i could use a little hair on my chest. ok, well not really, but it's good for me regardless. and now i'm working with my little girl curled up at my feet.
so far no more glass has been passed. so far, so good.
last night, started out as an ordinary wed night. a few of us including POD aka ry, nicole, seth and jess had made plans to meet.
earlier i had made a small batch of cream cheese brownies in a blue glass pyrex pan as i've been craving them lately. this is not random information... keep reading...
i made a nice stir fry on the stove for dinner and had moved the brownies to the counter for safe keeping until i could put them back on the stove behind the tall pots that normally protect them from the large rat that enjoys surfing my counters while i'm not home (my dog for those newbies reading this).
i was running a little late and cleaned up some, gave the monster her evening bone and hopped on the rockhopper to roll downtown. a few hours later, i returned - in good spirits from a chill evening. i walked in the living room from my garage and noticed some strange blue fragments on the carpet covered with an unfamiliar brown gooey substance.
??
this is a normal occurance you see. i come home and there is some strange thing on the floor - a plastic container - perhaps a chop stick. my girl enjoys pulling things that have any remnant of food on them off of the counter. i started to contemplate what she could have possibly gotten into that was blue. then i thought...
no way.
alas, she had managed to get up on the counter, drag the glass pan onto the floor and eat ALL of the brownies in the pan.
there was glass *everywhere*. brownies smashed into the floor...
now it is fairly amazing that she was able to take out a heavy duty pan like that. however - explain to me how a dog could possibly smash such a pan on the counter. and then still get glass all over the floor - spreading into the hall and living room.
she almost went up for adoption last night... but she's too damn cute to follow through with such an idle threat.
she knew i was upset though. she slept downstairs and didn't even try to come up and sleep in her usual spot next to my bed.
and ps - i spent a good hour cleaning this mess up this morning... and the floor still needs to be mopped - AGAIN.
yesterday, ll, jessEFX and biggie smalls (yours truly) braved the trails of scotia. It was another great ride AND i was able to get through small obstacles that had tied me up in previous weeks. i picked up and ran into a few branches and trees along the way... added a few nice scratches to my legs and arms... but it was a fun ride, and another great confidence builder. on the way home we ran into todd who was out with his dog snuffles (whose real name is kona, but linda thought snuffles was more fitting).
Today was all about the dogs. We went to the usual spot down in boalsburg where they splashed, chased balls and sticks, and managed to get as muddy as possible.
Some how we managed to get them all to sit still long enough for a picture. call it luck. they weren't there long.
my girl is all about swimming. she's super slick in the water - guess she wants to be like mom was back in the day.
i'm on a diet by default. it's called the "my dog snatches all of the food off of my counters before i can eat it myself" diet. don't be fooled by the lovable brown furry face, the clown-like behavior, the chewbacca like noises or the ridiculous sleeping position (see above pict).. she's cunning, quick, and isn't afraid to go in for the kill the second your back is turned. lemon bars, salad, croutons, bread... and don't forget the kiddie toy that came out of the last box of cereal... mmmmm nothing like a little plastic to wash down a nice leafy salad with croutons.
While I was going to write about an awesome bike ride through the mountains today, i have a better story to tell... the large rat that lives in my house - also known as Chaya the labrador retriever - was caught today. Well, not in the act, however the evidence is strong and quite convincing. She is an artful and skilled counter surfer and has been caught in the act numerous times. she has been perfecting her trade for months cleaning dirty dishes in the sink, and finishing various items left on the counter. This time, she has gone too far. Please take note of exhibit a (above):
Take careful note of the unusual white growth on the snout. This my friends, is sugar, remnants from the HOME MADE lemon bars that I was hoping to enjoy after dinner tonight. This same crusty discoloration is also abundantly spread around her neck and upper chest. see exhibit b - i think the connection is quite clear:
those bars had NOT been touched when i left for my bike ride. And if you know me, then you know that I am a sugar fein... you don't mess with a girl's sweet tooth. Has she no shame? (exhibit A1)This means war. You, the jury, are left to decide. Guilty? or Not Guilty? and PS - she didn't want dinner tonight. 
Now, the bigger question is how am i ever going to satisfy my sweeth tooth tonight?
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