creep(y)

Sometimes people, particularly guys, fall into a creep rut... fueled by alcohol they slowly drown. Sometimes a chicas only defense is blunt honesty - afterall they need to know that they're encroaching upon creep territory.

The other weekend i went out with some friends. After a stop at a downer party, luna dropped nic and i off at my house and we decided to check out Zenos.

inside the bar, we found a nice group hanging out, dancing, etc... familiar faces, it was all good.
i was in a particularly good mood and was thus talking to everyone. within a few minutes we were introduced to a guy, wearing a cowboys hat - ewwww dallas - i can not put into words how much i dislike that team.

he opened his mouth and had nothing of interest to say... so i zoned him out. but when pressed for conversation, i told him i disliked the cowboys. he decided to insult me in return. it was a special moment.

whatever dude. i zoned him out again.

an hour or so passed... intoxications levels rose, yet i was in a totally sober zone of talking, dancing and just having fun being out.

at the height of my perfect zone... said cowboys fan walks over undoubtedly fueled by liquid courage, faces me (i'm facing the band) makes direct eye contact and asks me to dance.

i say no thanks.

he asks again.
i say no again.

he asks again.
i tell him to ask nic.

i figured nic would take on the wingwoman role, have my back and say she had a boyfriend - sending him on his way. instead she told him she was taken and I WAS SINGLE.

OH SHIT. to a drunk single guy - many anyway - a single lady is kinda like a bloody carcus to a 5 gilled shark... ok so maybe that's a slight exaggeration but... his eyes got real wide...

a guy who's

1. possibly lonely or confused
2. on the prowl
3. inspired by liquid courage aka BEER

is apt to pounce. he resumed eye contact with me.

crap.

so now, not only was he on a mission to pick me up (he was hardly subtle), but also he still wanted to dance. i didn't want to dance with him for multiple reasons including but not limited to:

1. he was incredibly boring
2. i was enjoying my girls night out
3. i knew he was a horrible dancer and what fun is that?
4. he was a cowboys fan
5. he was way, way WAY too pushy.
6. general sucking (he sucked, not on a lollipop or something).

so on and on he goes on why i should dance with him.

"is it so wrong to want to dance with a beautiful girl?"
a half-assed complement... and it went so well with the earlier spewed insults and the dallas hat... heh. this dude doesn't know a damn thing about me and still is persistant...i responded "thanks, but i still don't want to dance with you"

"if we'd hang out, you would have so much fun with me" he says.

woah buddy - so now we're hanging out too? he has now crossed into seriously creepy territory.

"i'm not a creepy guy, you'd like me. i'd treat you really well"

within a matter of minutes we had gone from nfl rivals, to dancing partners to relationship status... apparently now we're contemplating dating.
consider these rules of engagement:

1. girls don't dig pushy guys with an air of desperation. desperate = lack of confidence= potentially needy. confidence is a must!
2. just because a girl is single, doesn't mean that she wants to dance, hang out with, be with any single guy she meets. being single isn't an inherent invitation to be picked up with persistence! we ladies believe in natural selection too.
3. if a girl says no thanks, respect that dammit and give her some space. there's nothing more unattractive than a guy who doesn't back off when asked.

so back to the story at hand, dallas man has hit a new low. and he's now directly standing in front of me, encroaching upon my personal bubble, staring at me, waiting for me to dance with him. i'm annoyed as i can't really dance without him thinking i'm dancing with him. He's also blocking my view of the singer in the band - who's decidedly hot.

i decided honesty was the best policy at this point.

"i'm not that creepy guy" he said "i'm a good guy" this was a point of
contention between the two of us. while he may not be a creepy guy in the light
of day, sans alcohol, at this moment in his life - he was the epitome of creepy.
"oh, you totally are that creepy guy." i replied - staring directly into his
eyes.

"how am i creepy?" did he really not know??

"well, you're standing in front of me, staring at me with beady wide eyes, asking me to dance. and when i tell you no, you don't go away. This behavior defines creepiness".

he was stunned... he stood in front of me like a deer in headlights, speachless. he shook my hand and moved on to another set of girls standing in another corner of the bar. and it only took 20 minutes to get this point across! sorry to be rude dallas stalker, but i had to do it and ps TO is too full of himself to consistently play well.

phew...

persistence doesn't always pay off. and in fact, in some instances, it equates to creepiness... proceed with caution!