weight lifted

the doctor's office can be the most daunting place in the world. cold, dismal. the waiting - minutes feel like hours. all the equipment surrounding is less than comforting... which ones do what you wonder. i sat and sat, anxiety rising waiting to be done with what i had been worrying about for over a month. there are some times when the thought of anesthesia isn't all that bad. to kill the anxiety atleast.

... in the aftermath i walked out with entire body tension, knotted stomach, nausea, spinning head, shaky hands, legs tired from being tense for the duration. i pushed the clutch down in my subi and realized my legs were still quivering - all from my own anxiety of course. i guess this is fairly common as the nurse confirmed "you're not going to pass out are you?"before i left the office. apparently many people pass out.

it's over and now i don't have to anticipate it - just wait for hopefully encouraging results. now i can study with a clear mind.

ironically, while this was all going on, i was being called from work... guess what - the server crashed and apparently the other person who should be able to fix things couldn't get it to restart. unbeknownst to me, i am now a server expert. i texted my boss before i went in - ummmm... i'm kinda preoccupied right now but i'll drop by the lab when i'm done if i can.

lightheaded and nauseous, i avoided as much communication as possible with colleagues, coerced the server to reboot and homeward i went to recover. i finished off the day with a trip to the vets office. poor chaya is now on a diet, the little porker has gained close to 5 pounds!! poor girl.
she also has a plaque problem and needs to start flossing. i told her this but i'm not sure how receptive she was.

i guess i'll have to start brushing my dog's teeth. weird.

there are worse things i guess - and worse days. and now i have nothing to worry about other than this impending exam. so i'm back to - bring it on...