all about the climb...

this weekend was an interesting one... aside from LOTS of riding in the woods on the cross and mtn bike... alone and with good friends - i caught up with some good genuine people.

i continually think to myself - regardless of work / relationship situations - how am i so fortunate to have so many consistently good friends and people in my life?

today tho, marked what could have been the worst ride ever... almost. the ride was out to colyer and around via double track / fire roads... i'd been wanting to ride this route for weeks and each time something came up that prevented it from happening. plans were set, bike was ready (or so i thought)... so i picked up cecilia around 830 to roll out to the forest...

we met up with kate and set off around 9. the ride was smooth at first.. up bear meadows... i started to zone off a bit as i often do with group rides. we hit treaster kettle and started the descent... i was feeling good and brave given the past 2 days of riding off road so i let go of the brakes and let my bike take me down the gravel laden road. dust in the air, cooling breeze, and lush green forest - such a release... towards the bottom, i felt my bike begin to fish tail... the grade had let up and the gravel was certainly not that deep - i knew something was wrong.

i came to a quick halt - rear wheel flat. great.

this was the first flat on this bike - ever. i like to ride at a lower tire pressure for shock absorption and i think today it caught up with me. i went to change the tube... out came the spare and my pump.

when i first got the bike i asked my friends - is a cross tire the same size as a road tire? they answered yes. i was really asking if the tubes were the same - but i didn't know any different...
now i do.

i pulled out the old tube, found the tiny puncture, inspected the tire and went to put in the new tube. quickly i realized the spare was significantly more narrow...

yes, welcome to reality - road tubes are different than cross.

it barely filled the inside of my rim and i thought there was no possible way that would get me either home - or further along on my ride.

at this point - given the week ive had... i was near meltdown. i'm normally am controlled enuf to maintain composure until i'm alone. not today. as i realized the ladies were going to have to ride back to pick me up. i lost it.

so there i was at the bottom of this fantastic climb... thinking about them climbing up and wishing i was riding. i was waiting, stuck with a limp bike and all of the thoughts of the week began to flood my mind...

i sat for a while, on a rock across the road staring at my upside down bike, sobbing and feeling sorry for myself. feeling like "what the hell did i do to have this sort of week"...

then i realized that i needed to take control of this situation and my life as feeling sorry would get me no where.

i put my wheel back on the bike and began to walk holding the back of the bike up so as not to damage the rim. up i went in my cleats, helmet clamped to my pack... and close to an hour later of walking... down came my little turbo subi.

if nothing else, my little walk certainly cleared my mind.

i decided this would not be the end of the ride - as the day was still young and stopped by the only shop open on a sunday am to pick up some proper tubes. we set off yet again to ride in the woods... and had a nice ride trying and riding through some other spots where i normally bail.

long story short... well long at this point... i was told at the shop that i probably could have made the road tube work in that particular "emergency" situation... is this true??

but... in the end it worked out and i got some riding in even though it wasn't quite the intensity i initially sought. and in the end, the day ended up being great as post ride, jess and i got the chocolate dogs together to swim and caught up some along the way...

feeling sorry for myself was getting me no where. feeling sorry for myself was blinding me to all of the good that i have in my life. feeling sorry for myself wasn't allowing me to consider the situation - and make the best of it - make it work.

i think it's time to stop feeling sorry, and wondering... and wishing... to take control, relax and try to figure out whats best. then move forward. there are many more rides ahead... and the reality is that life's just too short to be stuck at the bottom of a hill, wondering "why". when all you really want to do is continue to climb.