puzzles

If life is a puzzle, then finding fitting pieces is more an effort involving learning about, understanding and knowing yourself than figuring out what to do in the next second, hour, month or year. Careful consideration of flaws, strengths and weaknesses can shed light on obstacles facilitating insight into how they can be overcome, bypassed or simply squashed. Self-awareness of state of mind can inform relationship success not to mention degree of manageable tolerance of those with views and demeanors that are polar opposite on any given day.

Focus in work and school has not been enough as of late. Given that, I've got my sights set on this 100 mile mountain bike race which will certainly push the limits of skill and endurance. And not wanting to ride for 12 hours on edge, i figure surmounting some confidence issues now, will increase the potential for rolling over that finish line in August with a smile on my face. So i've been tackling logs. Not big ones of course, small log piles. Ones just big enough to catch the chain ring at the top and knock me just enough off balance that i tense up but still get over. or atleast now I do. I contemplated some on sunday but psyched myself out. I would look, roll up, and brake - over and over. Yesterday, I rolled out with a slightly different outlook. I knew I overthink everything - so i used that to my advantage. I rolled up to a pile, stopped and contemplated it. I imagined the bike rolling over, imagined the chain ring sticking at the top, and imagined my ass landing in a pile of blueberries alongside the trail if I really screwed up -- been there done that. I then backed up, pedaled, and before i knew it - i was over. And then again. and again.

I did this over and over riding trails with multiple piles until I got through them relatively smoothly and without hesitation. Granted they were small obstacles but progress was made and confidence built. Sweet! Sometimes what you need to overcome a particular fear is an understanding of what that fear truly is about and an awareness of why it's there. This combined with a keen understanding of self and how your mind processes challenge, makes it that much easier to put the pieces together and get through those obstacles.

PS: HAPPY BIRTHDAY GRUMPY OLD MAN!!. Send E your best if you haven't already cause we don't need him to be more grumpy than he already is :) :)

Random pictures:

This puzzle was not to be solved. We weren't sure whether it was the pedal of the cleat - but they weren't working mellow day on the road.


Above: the coolest farm ever ... full of goats - YES GOATS! and Great Pyreneese puppies (no these are not birds, they are dogs!) :) SO CUTE.

Left: fun at the timber show (oh the joys of my job). Right: the girliest bug ever. check out the daisy rims!